The "Creepy Guy": Myth or reality?

Depending on the gender of the person being asked, the answer is almost always a variation on "There are definitely creepy guys out there" (female) or "Women are all just way too uptight" (male - and perhaps a victim of the "creepy guy" label).

Why the difference in views?

One could easily argue the perpetuation of gender stereotypes which finds its way on and off again into media, classroom debates and workplace "sexual harassment" seminars nationwide. The idea something along the lines of "when a guy sleeps with a lot of women, he's a stud - but when a women sleeps with a lot of guys, she's a slut," type thing, which in this situation becomes "when a girl stares and flirts openly with a guy upon meeting him, she's easy - when a guy does it, he's creepy." But does this really cover everything? If it's just a stereotype, why is it that so many people can call up at least one instance of this happening to them? That one person who suddenly came on too quickly - guy or girl - with comments along the lines of "we should totally hook up, do you mind if I get your phone number?" within moments of meeting you, and quite possibly after you made it clear that you weren't interested.
Perhaps it's the result of another stereotype, one which most people automatically assume but don't actually think to themselves - vulnerability. For most men, in any situation - at a party, with friends, at the bar - when a girl comes up and starts flirting with them, there is no sense of danger (unless she happens to be a body builder, that is). The general assumption there is that if he turns her away, he doesn't have to worry about her following him to his car and assaulting him, following him home, etc. Even if she did, so what? What physical danger does a girl present?
While on the female end of this, even if a guy is relatively the same size, the moment most girls are confronted by a flattering, forward guy, motives come into question. A startlingly low number of women are happy with their bodies (should you choose to look it up) and therefore see any sudden flood of positive comments on their bodies or appearances as insincere, and probably an attempt towards an easy lay, etc. And, the vulnerability stereotype here being that a girl is less able to defend herself than a guy, worries concerning how to handle the situation and turn a guy away instantly arise.
Does that mean that when a girl mentally declares a guy "creepy" that she's just defending herself?
Not necessarily.
While nearly every woman out there seems to have something they'd like to change about themselves (dyeing their hair, getting contacts because glasses seem too "bookish," etc), there are always those that quickly get labeled a "bitch" or "ditzy" for being confident or arrogant about their looks. Presumably, these girls being more physically desirable, would get more attention from so called "creepy guys" and have to deal with them more often - but the men, "creepy" or not, who get turned away by these women, are probably understandably upset and label them back in the aforementioned ways.

So what makes a man creepy? A quick search spits back these results:
-Too much too fast
-Staring
-being emotional, touchy-feely or "too personal" before getting to know a girl
etc
However, when one is trying to get into a relationship, isn't that what happens? You do everything you can to get to know a person, and share yourself with them - you want to see them, and you want to tell them everything. So is the creepy guy label the result of a one-sided genuine attempt at forming a relationship?

The undeniable truth is, there are men out there just looking for an easy lay, but there are just as many guys looking for a real relationship who approach a certain girl the wrong way. Not to mention the constant propagation of the idea that all girls grow up with, that all men are just out to get in their pants.

My final thoughts? (Not that you really care)

It's unfortunate that the creepy-guy label exists. There are more important things to worry about. So a girl gave you a weird look and turned you away - chalk it up to experience. So a guy gave you the jitters and made you nervous - don't talk to him. Some people are even proud to be considered creepy.
There are major government cover-ups, corrupt politicians and media, drug-abuse, disease, homelessness, war and - oh no! - work or school on Monday, at least for some of the wanderers reading this. You're worried about the word creepy?

Seriously now. But, after all that, some real humor, regarding creepy guys.

You will go crazy.

A couple of years back, a friend introduced me to the website www.bash.org - a great way to kill time, by the way. In case you don't actually feel like checking out the site, it's basically a compilation of quotes gleaned from conversations people have had over any net-based communication. These quotes are generally funny because they seem to be real, and reference unexpected, often ridiculous and sometimes nearly brilliant experiences or thoughts.

There was one quote among these that stuck with me over the years, bothering me time-to-time when it came to mind:

#443655 +(1626)- [X]

Let's say you have an ax. The kind that you could use, in a pinch, to hack a man's head off...
And let's say that very situation comes up and for some very solid reasons you behead a man.
On the follow-through, though, the handle of the ax snaps in half in a spray of splinters.
So the next day you take it to the ax store down the block and get a new handle, fabricating a story for the guy behind the counter and explaining away the reddish dark stains as barbeque sauce.
Now, that next spring you find in your garage a creature that looks like a cross-bred badger and anaconda. A badgerconda.
And so you grab your trusty ax and chop off one of the beast's heads, but in the process the blade of the ax strikes the concrete floor and shatters.
This means another trip to McMillan & Son's Ax Mart. As soon as you get home with your newly-headed ax, though, you meet the reanimated body of the guy you beheaded last year.
He's also got a new head attached and it's wearing that unique expression of "you're the man who killed me last Spring" resentment that one so rarely encounters in everyday life.
You brandish your ax. He takes a long look at the weapon with his squishy, rotting eyes and in a gargly voice he screams, "that's the same ax that slayed me!"
...Is he right?

I have no idea if I should have heard of this sooner - friends who heard me quote this rather unusual riddle too them seemed to have no idea either. Yet, a quick look with your favorite search engine reveals that this, and similarly worded riddles, have been used in forums for ages. It never occurred to me to look it up before now. The reason for my sudden interest in its origins?

Today while checking the latest page of a favorite web-comic about a Doctor who is also a ninja (www.drmcninja.com), I saw a link at the bottom of the page. I'm not sure what drew me to click it, which given what it led to may be a little concerning, but I discovered the e-book (now apparently also in print, and I plan to buy a copy) "John Dies at The End."

I'm only 16 pages into it at this moment, and I am completely addicted. I have had to take a break to keep my eyes from melting, and my brain from trying to climb out the back of my head to take a breather. But I digress- that strange, nonsense riddle is actually part of the opening to said book (what I have posted above is actually a very shortened version of the full riddle) and pure idiot-babble that it may seem to be at first, it now makes complete sense to me.

The first page of this e-book warns that you will go crazy trying to figure that riddle out - and I had my moment of hesitation, being the paranoid that I am. But now I've started, and I'm going to push through this sucker to the end. Said sucker is a high-speed, often almost stream-of-though novel (which I almost wish was presented as non-fiction to really mess with people) about a man named Dave Wong (not his real name - Wong just happens to be the most common surname on the planet) and his friend John whom, as the titles suggests, is probably going to be dead by the end of the story. Psychics, spirits, ankle-deep pools of feces, talking dogs, people that aren't there, cell-phone bratwursts and monsters emerging from puddles of urine with chin-strap wigs, insinuations as to the aliens, demons, angels and the end of the world - and like I said, I'm only on page 16.

I have never been for stories that do nothing but intrigue - as an audience or a reader, you expect some give, some time to breathe and figure things out, but this story just keeps pushing and pushing and handing you very little. Just enough, in fact, to keep you from giving up altogether. Over 50,000 people have read this e-book to the end, and as a banner on the site proudly proclaims, 97% of people who bought the book on Amazon.com gave it a 5 star rating. I'm sure I'll do the same.

My recommendation? Risk the insanity and read "John Dies at The End."

http://www.johndiesattheend.com/